How to Tip Drill (not the BET Uncut kind)

This weekend I saw an ex girlfriend who stirred the pot o' beef again. This old bitch owes me $70 from New Year's, two years ago.She's one of those friends whose vocab often consisted of, "Ooh I gotta stop at the ATM", or "Since you brought the Grey Goose, I'll get you a drink at the club." The one that makes me the most furious is the 'helpless' response of, "I don't have any cash on me." What the hell is with grown ass adults NOT having cash on them? What if there's an emergency?! What if since I muthafuckin DROVE, I DON'T think I should pay for parking?I HATE when I get to the pay booth in the parking lot and am offered nothing..The most ridiculous part is often these leeches think they're the HOTTEST thing since habaneros. If you have diamond studs in your ears but just have a TCF card that your're unwilling to withdraw at a Wells Fargo machine, kick rocks. Don't even get me started on tipping at the bar. If you don't have the money to tip SOMETHING to your bartender, don't order a drink. Seriously. The person dealing with your drunk ass is prolly getting minimum wage and his/her mortgage is banking on your tip.When folks wanna be like, "Well I didn't get exceptional service", understand that it isn't just about courtesy...its about MAKING it. I make a base pay as a hairstylist and shouldn't hafta offer fellatio to get a tip. You are in my chair for a certain amount of time, and if I remember you didn't tip last time-expect a rushed service with a couple extra slashes out of my spite. Have respect for those in the service industry, and quit taking advantage of your nice friends. I'm done with it.